Aotearoa New Zealand is my home, my identity.

Holidays in Central Otago have left me with an enduring love for the land. I live in the North Island, but my heart lies in the South.

My ancestry is grounded in Scotland, tracking back to the 17^th century in the Highlands, and back to the 12^th century in other areas. There are also strong Irish, Norse and English connections in my history.

After a variety of work experiences, including time in the UK, I taught in primary school for several years. I am still involved in education, but in a role that involves me in the support of teachers so they can better support their students.

Over the last few years I have become more and more engaged in what some have described as a spiritual journey.

I was searching, questioning …

• what lies behind, beside, above this world I live in?
• how do I explain the strange and mysterious events in my life?
• what is my purpose?
• how can I live with meaning and be true to myself?
• how do I adjust to aging?
• how do I cope with loss?

I’ve realised I need to look within – the answers lie within me. I need to dig deeper, not wider.

I need to trust the process of reflection. Writing has always been a powerful and effective way to process my feelings, and access my inner voice and understandings. When I write my way through a question, an idea, a crisis – I find my own meaning and truth.

I need to focus on my own desires and act with intention and engagement.

And so begins this online journal …

2020 update:
So interesting to re-read this and think – yes – this is all still true – but now I’m in a place where I’m less focused on the searching and more focused on how to best express myself. Just over two years ago I discovered I could draw, I could paint – what a revelation. Painting has become the medium I’m learning to understand and use – long term I want to find a way to combine it with writing.